Tuesday, December 22, 2009

I love being the bigger person!

And I am not talking about my weight! Fortunately, I am happy and no longer in a miserable marriage. I didn't realize what a strain it had become, always waiting for the other shoe to drop, something stupid that would set Mr.EX off. His anger issues had nothing to do with me, but he is the kinda guy who always needs someone else to blame.

I decorated my fabulous house the other day. While doing so I had to separate the Mr.EX's ornaments from mine. We had a deal that he would replace something he broke and I would return his keepsake ornaments.

I returned his ornaments the other day, no word from him. I know he was hoping that I wouldn't do it, he also likes to portray himself as a victim.

Mr.EX has never been a man of his word. I now understand why he never got mad at his daughter for lying. He lives a lie, why should he get mad that his daughter is also incapable of telling the truth?

Last year we were planning on going to Cleveland for Thanksgiving (for the anniversary of A Christmas Story Movie). Apparently, Ms. Princess (my ex step-daughter, 12 years old) didn't want to go, and she also didn't want to stay with her father for an entire week. So she and her mom concocted a terrible lie about how she was afraid to fly. When she came over for the weekend I asked her about her sudden fear of flying,

Ms.Princess "Yeah, I'm afraid to fly now."
Me "Oh that's too bad, you won't be able to fly to California with us."
Me "Busted"

Her ears and face turned red. She wasn't used to being matched with someone who actually saw what she was doing and called her on it. She told her friends at school I was a mean bitch! LOL! No, I wasn't mean, just apparently smarter than her mom and dad.

Mr.EX never wanted to correct her faults so he just ignored them. He liked to say "She only spends 4 days a month with me, what am I supposed to do?" Which fit his victim mentality so when she ends up being a complete and total bitch like her mother, he can place all blame on the mom.

I am glad that I didn't have to shop for those people this Christmas. It's hard buying for Ms. Princess, she gets everything she wants when she asks for it, or rather has a meltdown in Wal-Mart that would make a 2-year-old proud. She actually said last year that she hated December. I asked her why. Her response was, "Cause I can't get what I want, WHEN I want it! I have to WAIT for Christmas!!" Which was funny because she never had to wait for anything. She had brand new things every time she came over.

There was one story she told about some rabbit stuffed animals she had. I asked her why she had 3 large stuffed animal rabbits exactly alike. "Well, my grandma took me to Toys R Us and told me I could pick out a stuffed animal. I didn't see anything I liked so I just got something I already had." Apparently this had happened more than once!

I can bet money that she asked for something for Christmas that she already had and still didn't know how to use, like a new cell phone or mp3 player. It's really quite sad.

I hope all my readers had a great Christmas too! I loved being home with my boys and spending time only with them and my great friends!

AND, I made an A in my Domestic Law class!!! Go figure with all the work I did on my own divorce!

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Heather said...

Yay Lisa! Glad you're back blogging and glad you're happy!

Merry belated Christmas and Happy New Year to you, my dear!

jen said...

So happy for you that you had a peaceful Christmas! I can totally relate to the step-daughter thing - mine has just turned 13, is also exactly like her lying mother, and doesn't want to come to our house anymore. We don't force her to and things are so much more peaceful without her here. Sad to say, but true. Fortunately, unlike your ex-jerk, my husband recognizes her for what she is and doesn't let her get away with her crap (which is why she doesn't want to come here). She was considering a Christmas visit, and we said no. If she doesn't want to come every other weekend, why should she come on Christmas? (She just wanted the goods - but we didn't buy her any.) Now that I'm typing this out, it sounds so vindictive to be so against a 13-year-old girl, but I know you'll understand because you've lived through it too. The selfishness, the lying, the nasty words when she doesn't get her way...I know you get it.

Twisted Lisa said...

hey Jen, I hear ya!
The problem with Ms. Princess is that she acts like a perfect angel when around her dad. Even her mom keeps her horrible behavior a secret from Mr.Ex. Trouble in school, trouble with her friends... but it's all perfect as far as he knew. The problems began when I started showing him that his perfect little angel wasn't one.

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